This scene from Louis C.K.'s sitcom, Louie, is being celebrated all over the internet:
A Jezebel article called it " absolutely magnificent" summing it all up as "Vanessa, who knows she's fat and is okay with it, isn't having it and
proceeds to deliver one of the best dressing downs ever seen on
television."
Was the author watching the same scene while doped up? First of all, Vanessa clearly is NOT okay with being fat, and in fact states "I'm fat. It sucks to be a fat girl. Can people just let me say it? It sucks. It really sucks."
Second, as far as delivering one of the best dressing downs ever seen on tv, while the character of Vanessa indeed serves up an unfiltered reprimanding, it was more pathetic than empowering or charming. She basically proceeds to beg to have her hand held until her subject relents. Did Louie have any other option that would salvage his humanity?
The exchange above, filled with awkward pauses, strained filming, and the actress's amateurish delivery, was completely unrealistic as far as its effectiveness in the real world outside of scripted television. A relationship has no (good) future that stems from forcing a person into acting upon feelings he/she doesn't have, and any person who would settle for as much probably isn't worth dating anyway. Vanessa has no qualms about employing the "guilt-trip" with little regard for the feelings of the object of her affection simply to get what she wants, conveying an immaturity and selfishness that are way bigger red flags for date-ability than her waistline. It would have been far more empowering if the character, following her rant, had not settled for pity-intimacy but instead made Louie work for it.
Have fat women and their supporters really set the bar this low? Somebody get Vanessa a copy of "He's Just Not That Into You" stat. Her weight is the least of her problems, and probably representative of overeating to fill the gaping hole of her missing self-esteem.
I did not exercise today because I felt under the weather (not that I need any excuses not to exercise).
I enjoyed a delicious dinner prepared by my lovely Mummy. Baked salmon steak, mashed plantains and beans, plain yogurt and spicy Indian pickle... all up in my face. YUM.
I first noticed Kristen Merlin during the "blind" auditions of the Voice. I don't even follow country music (or the Voice) but I thought she nailed it. I put "blind" in quotes because my skeptical nature does not allow me to entertain that Blake Shelton was oblivious to Kristen's appearance when he chose not to swivel his chair. Kristen already had an uphill battle in this competition, the winner of which is ultimately determined by viewer votes. No matter how talented she is, I can't see a butch lesbian winning a popularity contest in America. Well, The Voice producers seem committed to giving gravity an assist by greasing the hill and dropping anvils on our girl.
After the blind auditions, contestants are further weeded out in not one, but two, Battle Rounds, and not once, but twice, Kristen's battles were not featured on television along with her other competitors. Instead, "blink and you won't hear them" recaps established that Kristen had made it to the Playoffs round, in which the coaches made their final team cuts before the live show featuring the 12 finalists. No other finalist's Battle Rounds were recapped twice (or at all, save one other finalist, Christina Grimmie). In a show, where fan following and viewer votes determine the winner, I can't imagine that the show's producers don't realize the deficit this wreaks on a competitor. Now, to dig that hole twice as deep for the same (and only) person is either inexcusably careless or effing calculated. So fine, life, and apparently The Voice, isn't fair.
However, tonight, I witnessed an event that I don't believe has ever happened to a finalist on any (including the live airings) of the now absurd number of singing competitions on television. Tonight, in the first live show of the competition, Kristen Merlin's microphone went dead in the middle of her performance, rendering the climax of her song inaudible to anyone.
Here's video - her performance was stunning despite her being silenced for the 21 seconds (1:24 to 1:45) immediately preceding the last word of the song.
For those who would argue that those last 20 seconds or so are neglible, I draw your attention to the final seconds of these performances: 1) 2:48 t0 3:12 in this clip of Whitney Houston's performance of the National Anthem at the 1991 Super Bowl:
2) 1:40 to 2:02 of Paul Potts' star-making performance on Britain's Got Talent:
3) Would it not diminish her Grammy-winning performance if 20 seconds were botched off of any part of Jennifer Hudson's climax here in Dreamgirls? The judges attempted to smooth over the debacle with trite remarks, such as commenting that Kristen handled the situation so gracefully that it seemed like nothing had happened. However, shit did happen! This "mishap" eviscerates the purported integrity of this sham of a competition! Now, The Voice is proceeding along through the rest of the live show like nothing went awry, as if they didn't just majorly screw over a finalist in a voting-based round determining eliminations.
A solitary mic-failing incident would be bad enough, but a series of unfortunate "coincidences" reeks to me and you know that saying (that I just improvised) - if it looks and smells like horse shit, then you don't need to effing eat it to know what The Voice is serving, with an anvil on top.
Imagine, you get Chinese takeout at 5 pm. You request extra soy sauce. You pay with your credit card. The next day at noon, you are given a call by Kung Pao Panda informing you that your credit card has been charged an additional $4.99 for the extra sauce from the previous evening. Does this seem legit to you?
Well, according to GrubHub, an online food ordering service, there's nothing ludicrous about it at all.
GrubHub allows users to
order food for delivery and takeout from restaurants through their website or mobile app. It's a convenient way of identifying multiple
restaurants that will deliver to your location, viewing their menus and
ordering online instead of through the phone - if you don't mind the
usual extended delivery times, at least an hour in my experience and
sometimes even longer.
So, I was charged $2.75 for extra
sauce on a pizza order through GrubHub. Somewhat obnoxious, but nothing
earth shattering there. Here's what set off my inner ornery old person -
I was notified via email by GrubHub about the additional charge to my
credit card, without my permission, about 4 hours after I ate the effing
pizza, when the restaurant contacted GrubHub directly. How
does a vendor, who has my authorization to make a specific one-time
transaction using my credit card info, have the right to make additional
charges to my credit card without my permission and with no prior notice? According
to GrubHub customer service, this sentence on their website: "Add
special instructions here (additional charges may apply)" allows for
this. Um, no. "Additional charges may apply" does not equal "we can make
additional charges on your credit card if we feel like it without
telling you, well after your order is already processed and eaten."
Also, there's no notice to consumers of
GrubHub's policy, as they communicated it to me, which allows
restaurants to contact GrubHub to make additional charges to your
credit card, up to $5, within a 24 hour period, without requiring authorization
by or prior notice to the customer/credit card owner.
Apparently, this is what you sign up for when you use GrubHub's third
party service to order food.
Needless to blog, I got my damn $2.75 refunded after debating my case to 4 different customer service representatives. It wasn't about the money - it was about calling out GrubHub on their ridiculous policy. I won't be ordering through them again.
mr Mayer
needs to park
that milk toast
girlie drivel
he calls muzak
& leave
the Patek/Rolex
prowess
to the best watch
expert
alive
c
— Charlie Sheen (@charliesheen) March 20, 2014
... for so many reasons. Timberfake tweeted this message after postponing his NY concert tonight:
I am truly sorry to everyone that have tickets for tonight. It kills me to have to do this. I hope to see you all on Friday. --JT
— Justin Timberlake (@jtimberlake) February 19, 2014
If it killed you, then who the eff is performing on Friday?
